Saturday, March 28, 2015


  I have been deeply obsessed with Mermaids for the last 6 weeks or so. My final project for creative writing was developing, revising, discussing and editing a short fiction piece and mine ended up being about Mermaids. I was deep in it and I loved it. The altered state of creating (being the conduit that brings a story to life) is better than almost anything. I've had the idea (and many false starts) stored in my memory for about 6 months and I think the piece is just now moving in the direction of what it needs become, idealistically. In my experience, stories need to figure themselves out. I just translate as the information is revealed to me. I love that about writing. It's mysterious and magical. It breaks my heart and quietly puts it back together.
   I've been actively daydreaming about picnics a ton and listening to Father John Misty around the clock. Boy, did he ever annoy me last year. His new album came out on double vinyl 45 and I was into the cover art so I impulsively bought it and spent a whole day falling way head over heels in love with it. Ladies, the words... Holy Moly, his wife is one lucky lady cuz that poetry is some deep and heavy stuff. I felt moved and really cool with clinging to my romantic ideals. I thought, "See, true romantics do exist!"
 I've been taking the little miss nettle hunting. She's a natural, hasn't been stung yet. The plants, they love her. She can find what we're looking for before I spot them. Her innocent spirit, a beacon, to all those skittish green fairies.

 These trees! The things they've seen. I enjoy their presence and imagine their origins and history.
  Last week I sat in dwindling sunlight with a Libra-Wood Tigress sister (you guys, I have finally found a birthday twin! It's amazing!!). The sand was warm on top and chilled beneath. Our babes played and argued at the waters edge. In that moment, it all felt so damn fine. Everything calm and chill. I was comfortable in my own skin,  and my heart was full of adoration for my darling friend. The breeze carried sounds of our fiery children bickering. It was all enough.

   My dreams have been wild & intense. Recurrent dreams of myself walking through an unknown and icy forest with a dark wolf by my side. The wolf is fierce but calming. I'm visited night after night by this spirit wolf. It's pretty wonderful. I wake up feeling energetically charged and alert. I feel like the wolf is a male, or could represent a mortal man. Maybe the wolf is showing me the strength I feel in independence or illustrating my innate survival mode? Perhaps he represents freedom and the removal of obstacles/the ending of a relationship?  I wonder what Freud and Jung would say... Honestly, I mostly wonder what Freud would say... I'm just into Freudian ideology. How did that happen?
  When I read my cards, the 10 of cups and the high priestess come up a lot. It feels good and opening. I appreciate the abundance of energy and believe that inward reflection and awareness will lead to a path illuminated with golden light.
  I'm trying not to force and shape my way down the path I'm traveling, I want to proceed as it unfolds before me. Bright and beautiful. xo m

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